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Oct. 6th, 2009

It's late, a late just a bit too late for an entry. Today was a nice day, well after work ended ofcourse. Finally got to see the Rays play at Tropicana, finally. Too bad the outcome came to be less than par, with a loss. It was completely fine, because the Rays season was still aeons better than a Rays season a couple years back. As always, my energy was high and that's always a contagious thing. I like being that icebreaker sometimes, I feel it's a duty of mine.. I'm up late and I have a speech to do about Bowling on Wednesday, maybe I could have picked a more interesting topic. I was kind of out of time and wanted to get started on something. I should have picked Puerto Rico.. :( Spoke to Dai today.. It gets harder and harder to speak with her, but at least it's not that often anymore. I do miss her but she needs to realize that things don't have much potential of changing anytime soon. She's still grasping on for dear life at what she can and it breaks my heart. She still hasn't been able to move on, I'm still in all her statuses.. Why can't the one person that I mean the world to just be around?? Am I doomed to be alone forever? I've been stuck on some childish chase with a 27 year old woman that would change her mind every five minutes.. I chased her around like a total fool because of a dozen stupid kisses and snuggles. I don't know exactly what I saw in her, she really isn't that affectionate of a person. She doesn't say sweet things, well at least when we were alone that way she never did. She can actually say pretty hurtful stuff.

School's just kind of stessful, need to focus and do well this semester.. so I may move on and make monay in my life. Been praying to Him more often, and loving him more and more as time flows by. Been feeling so much better with God and Jesus by me, holding my hand. I don't want to stop worshiping, I need to find my own way to continue. Since Rafael will be leaving soon, I'd like to see what I can continue doing for Bethel. I don't think I'll be continuing at Chi Alpha, I hate the idea of saying I don't feel a sense of belonging with a fellowship of christians, but the Campus Crave experience I feel could have been better. If Anthony asks me to play I don't know if I can just refuse so easily, he's a great guy. I guess it was mainly because of the certain isolation that came with being the bass player? I don't know. Hardly making it to church anymore, but that's not my fault. I've never had a Sunday off, and doubt I ever will, well at the airport at least.

I'd LOVE to make to Australia sometime SOON, again. Being an avid Hillsong UNITED fan has just fueled that fire, as I'd love to make it out to Hillsong Church to experience the best in Worship from the home court. Was thinking maybe sometime next summer, but I'd have to save save save now if I'd ever expect to have money for the trip on time. Can't wait until 'We're All In This Together' to come to theaters Nov. 4! Stoked about that..

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